Saturday, 25 June 2011

Gamefreak favourites: Wanted: Weapons of fate "Fear of flying" level.

Welcome to yet another Gamefreak Favourites video, the game in the frame today is Wanted: Weapons of fate. Based on the film, it sees you take on the mantle of a young dosser called Wesley, played by Mr. Tumnus from The Lion, the Witch and the wardrobe fame. He finds out he's the son of the worlds greatest assassin, and trains himself up to follow in his fathers footsteps. The game plays out through the past and the present, with playable flashback levels where you play as Wesley's dad which pads out the story.

It's a great little game, with some great use of cover, settings, some good, if a wee bit traditional, boss fights and a great feature in the bullet bending mechanic, where you can literally bend the rules of physics and make your bullets fly around corners.

I'll maybe do a small montage of the game, showing off some of the levels and boss fights, but if you haven't played it, i'd highly recommend it. It's a mish-mash of games with it's own take on things, and if anything, it's a diverting days worth of gaming.

Let me know what you think, and please comment if you have actually played the game.

And if you get a mo....pop over to youtube and like it if you liked it! I love my likes!!

Thursday, 23 June 2011

Gamefreak favourites: Mass Effect 2 Samara loyalty mission

Hey peeps, Tony here again, with yet more in the Gamefreak Favourites series. This time it's the turn of Mass Effect 2 and Samara's loyalty mission. Her daughter, Morinth, has turned all psycho and Samara wants to track her down and kill the hell out of her. If you haven't played this mission, or indeed Mass Effect 2, it has a few very mild spoilers, but nothing that will actually ruin the main story arch of the game. The loyalty missions just flesh out your crew members, and while there is a spoiler of sorts, it's a pure cosmetic one.

I liked this loyalty mission specifically as it does away with the combat. It's just you, the evidence that you can gather and the way you interact with the people, and in my eyes the best loyalty mission in the game follow the same structure.

So please, if you enjoyed the video leave a comment, or indeed pop over to Youtube and give me a like, or dislike....or hey, even subscribe so you get the notifications when you're next on your channel.

Your thoughts, as always, are appreciated.

Oh, and if you have any tickets for Expel 10.....get in touch.

Wednesday, 22 June 2011

Gears of War 3 Horde 2.0 Gameplay Briefing (HD 1080p)

All i'll say is watch the video. It looks like all the stops are being pulled out to make Horde 2.0 stand head and shoulders above the original, which is still a class act. I'll still be shit at it, but at least i'll have a load of keep myself busy with while i'm getting a Brumak rogering me senseless!

Gear of War 3 is sheduled for release on September 20th, 2011.

Interactive TV Ads on Xbox LIVE - Cannes Lions - Microsoft Advertising

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.........

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.........

You get the idea. It's your duty......neigh......RESPONSIBILITY to dislike this video.

I'd rather watch this video on a 24 hour cycle than "recommend" adverts to my friends.

Fucking Kinect........AAARRRGGHHHH!!!

Monday, 20 June 2011

Gamefreak Favourites: Call of Duty 4: Modern warfare "Death from above"

Hey peeps, thanks for popping along to my blog again. Another Gamefreak favourites, another epic level. This time, as you can no doubt tell, it's the "Death from above" level from COD 4, where you give gunner support to Cpt. Price and the S.A.S team from an death-laden AC-130 gunship circling above.

It's a live commentary from the AC-130 gunship wouldn't believe how roomy those planes actually are......comfy chairs too.


Sunday, 19 June 2011

Gamefreak Favourites: Call of Duty 4 Modern Warfare "All Ghillied up"

Alright peeps, thanks for dropping by, and if you're a dad happy father's day, I hope that you're getting some well earned gaming in.

This is the third video in my Gamefreak favourites, and as you can tell this time it's the turn of Call of duty 4: Modern Warfare, with the absolutely epic sniper level "all ghillied up", which sees you track your quarry through the atomic ruins of the Ukraine. It's hands down one of THE best levels in any FPS game, and if you disagree i'll cut out your teeth. It's the perfect example of "less is more" in the FPS in we don't need 45,000 explosions in a level for it to be classed as "immersive".

I'll have some more Gamefreak favourites coming up really soon, so keep on checking back, and by all means leave me a comment letting me know what you think.

And if you haven't looked already, i'm now doing a weekly video for the awesome gaming website Thumb Culture, called aptly enough "Thumb Culture TV, where every Friday i'll be doing a short video about anything and everything in the gaming world. You can pop along and see part 1, where I discuss the trend of HD remakes, right in this link. Again, leave a comment over there with your thoughts.

Have a great Sunday people!

Friday, 17 June 2011

The Worst of E3 2011.

This video is a demonstration of all that's currently wrong in the gaming world.

Kinect.....making people everywhere look like annoying epileptics!

I think the only thing that would have made this video worse is if the ghost of Michael Jackson appeared and joined the kids in a trip to "Neverland".

E3 2011.......the date gaming officially got boring!

Via VG247

Battlefield 3 Gameplay (PS3)...It looks fabby!

At last! The first "proper" console footage of Dice/EA's upcoming epic Battlefield 3 has been shown. It was the debut of the game on the Jimmy Fallon show the other night, and it left gamers in no doubt that they have nothing to fear visually from the PC game. It looks spectacular!

I want.....NOW!

Battlefield 3 is due for release on 28th October, 2011

Via Thumbculture

Thursday, 16 June 2011

Gamefreakblog and Thumb culture are partners!

Not in that sense, you filthy minded scallywag!

Today has seen the partnership of TWO of the most colossal forces in gaming. Nope....not Lara Croft's's the partnership of yours truly and the gorgeous gaming website, Thumb Culture.

Now partnership is the wrong word. I just needed an excuse to shoehorn a photo of Elton John in here somewhere. Basically i'm going to do a short weekly video for Thumb Culture, where I will look at gaming, new, old, good and bad, and spew out my thoughts. Pretty much the same as I do here, but with less references to cock and I say fuck a whole lot less. Well...actually never.

Thumb Culture is a great site. Clean, professional, and packed to the rafters with gaming news in one handy webzone. The last thing they need to bring it down is me spouting my bollocks and being all shouty on's a site for gamers of all ages, so my thoughts on there will come with a PG certificate.

I will be posting my Thumb Culture videos on my Youtube channel, but I will make a clear distinction between what are the videos I put on here, and what will go on T/Culture. Don't be fooled, i'm not "toning down" my act or anything like T/Culture videos will be basically just the same, but with no swearing and a more good/bad points, rather than just spewing hate on something. I just thought I would make a distinction which is the "uncut" me over the "volume turned down" me. All my thoughts and opinions will still be exactly the same.

We still haven't come up with an actual name for my section, but the first video is live. Here, I discuss the good and bad points with the current trend of HD remakes of old games. Take a look!

See? I've not changed. If you want to get the "gamefreak" feel just insert the odd fuck every now and again!

So i'll make some more announcements as they come. Of course, just click right here to pop over and check out Thumb Culture's site, their Facebook page....and you can also find them on Twitter.

If you like gaming, they will be your next stop after reading this!

Wednesday, 15 June 2011

Homefront vs Call of Duty vs Battlefield.....a gamefreak perspective.

Hey guys, thanks for tuning in again. Sorry it's been a short while....i've had boring things to do...such as the dishes, building shelves, and general boring life tasks. But have no fear, i'm back.

Due to some of the recent announcements at this years E3, and some other stuff iv'e heard people saying while i've been on some forums/twitter and certain vids on Youtube, I just thought I would give my own quick perspective on the big 3 military shooters out there, Homefront, Call of Duty and Battlefield. It's in no way an exhaustive commentary on the games, I could probably do half an hour on each game, which would bore the tits off of you. Rather, this is just a brief look at the single player and multiplayer modes of each, where I look at what I like and what I don't about them all.

As I say in the video, the comments I make are MY OWN PERSONAL COMMENTS! By all means leave a comment on here or youtube, send me a mail or get in touch via Twitter letting me know what you think about the games, but don't just say "'re wrong....Homefront is shit".....because it will just make you out as foolish as you probably are. If you have a genuine beef, at least make a back up point for your claim.

Anyhoo.....enjoy the video, and as always, your thoughts are appreciated.

*Awaits comments saying they agree with everything I say*

Friday, 10 June 2011

DmC Devil May Cry PS3, Xbox 360 E3 2011 trailer

Mmm....i'm not sure about this. Ok, we get a flash of Dante's white hair...great....brilliant.....fantastic. Let's be honest here, the DMC series has been hit and miss....1st game good, second bad, third good but unforgivable hard and forth was a return to form but with some arse cock stupid puzzle bits. This looks and sounds like DMC...but it doesn't feel like DMC. Where the cocky, over the top moves?? Well, I mean they are a bit over the top....but you know what I mean.....Where Dante?? Where's the wit and style?

Ah well...early days and all that.

Dragon's Crown PS3 PS Vita E3 2011 trailer

Now this game completely slipped by me at this years E3. Dragon's Crown is the latest game from the team that brought you Odin Sphere, and it look staggeringly good. 2D, hand drawn graphics, a homage to games like Golden Axe and Capcom's Dungeons and Dragons....but it looks a whole lot better. Breathtaking in fact. I'm sold on this game already. It apparently has some kind of cross gaming compatibility between PS3 and that's something i'll never experience.

It looks beautiful, I just can't stop watching it. And it's not because of the size of the sorceress's tits either. I mean...really though....they can't make casting spells easy. Mind you, if she was attacking me I wouldn't really care what spell she was casting!

Dragon's Crown is scheduled for release in Spring 2012.

Silent Hill Downpour Official E3 Trialer

The new E3 video for Konami's Silent Hill downpour has hit, and it looks......well....a bit like Silent Hill.

I haven't touched a Silent Hill game since The Room, so i'm cautiously optimistic about this. I shouldn't be, as that trailer scared the shit out of me. That weird thing coming towards him on the train thing at the end.....uuurrggghh.....

Thursday, 9 June 2011

Mass Effect 3: Live Action Trailer | E3 2011

This fantastic live action trailer for Mass Effect 3 has just landed. As if I needed any more convincing to get the game.

Mass Effect 3 is scheduled for release on 6th March, 2012

Wednesday, 8 June 2011

E3 2011......Nintendo.

"Look, we hear you. You want what you have always wanted, but you also want....something new" growled Reggie at the opening of Nintendo's E3 conference. He totally gave us that, but he also gave us two other things....the same old franchises and confusion over the new Nintendo system.

Yes, Nintendo showed off their new console. Well, at least the controller for the console. But before I get into that let's have a look at the 3DS. Take up has been slow so far, and there is a definate feeling of the 3DS being a slow burner. The new Nintendo 3DS store has just launched, and you can download a few decent Gameboy games, such as Super Mario and Zelda: Links awakening, as well as the stupidly addictive new companion to the shitter in the form of Gameboy Tennis. One can't help but feel that if Nintendo has waited until THIS E3 to announce that the 3DS was available to buy, TODAY.....with all this stuff ready and waiting for consumers from the offset that the gaming world would have gone into meltdown. Instead, the 3DS had a bunch of titles that we basically knew were coming, with a few highlights. Mario Kart looked once more like it has lost it's way, with "Karting" now taking to the air with huge jumps aided by what appear to be hang-gliders strapped to the top, and water is no longer the barrier that once was, with karts now diving beneath the waves and James Bond-style propellers farting out of the back of the karts. One step too much for me, and if Mario Kart even DARES to kill me if I go into the water at the sides of a course after introducing water courses I will officially kill the developers! Starfox looked great, and i'm looking forward to that a great deal. Ocarina is a remake, and even though it comes with the Master Quest mode and a few other additions it's still a port.....a port of one of the most respected games ever i'll admit, but chance of a new adventure? The new Super Mario looked great, the love child of Super Mario World and Mario 64, and I can't wait to get my hands on it. Same with Luigi's mansion 2, which adds several mansions for you to go and suck the dead out of. Another showreel blared out, featuring the likes of Driver, Metal Gear Solid, Tekken, and a whole bunch of other games which could be a boost for the system. I for one wasn't expecting Tekken. All in all a good showing for the 3DS.

The Wii was catered for with the new trailer for Zelda: Skyward Sword, which is was incorrectly predicted by internet know-it-alls the world over as going over to the new system. Oh's on the Wii and it's looking great...released for Christmas this year, and in another bit of Zelda related news Zelda: Four Swords will be released as a free download for DSi owners...which is nice. There was probably more news about the Wii, but I don't pay attention to games that make you look like you're trying to swat an invading army of invisible wasps whilst playing, so the Wii can fuck off.

Anyway. To the new system. You have all seen it so i'm not going to go into detail. The main showing was the controller, which drew simultaneous gasps of joy and " this the console?. Looking like a classic controller that's been subjected to torture and stretching on a rack, and whilst it was down someone stapled a small iPad to it, it did look veeeeeery "Apple". Clean, neat, a joypad version of Carol Vorderman. Demos of the unit in action shot over the big screen, with FPS style games, a unique way of playing golf with the new pad acting as a sandy tee with the ball on it, while you use the compatible Wiimote as a club, all sorts of technical demos which both astounded and confused at the same time. The SINGLE most impressive thing in my eyes was the answer to the age old arguement of who gets to use the TV. No longer, with the new "WiiU" console....yep, that's the name....if you're enjoying "Mario porno party kart 3" and your beloved comes into the room demanding to watch the next pile of X-Factor bollocks, no longer do you have to sulk...simply transfer the game to the controller and carry on playing with the screen now acting as your new TV. That part was spellbinding, and as far as i'm concerned probably one of the biggest draws to the system. All the big boys are on board, with some huge 3rd part support with Assassins Creed and Battlefield 3 looking like they are coming to the system. All good then?

The whole showing of this new system was so badly done it beggars belief. I still have more questions about it than answers, and that's no way to launch a console to consumers. I'm a big boy.....a very big boy in certain areas, and I can usually figure shit out on my own. On no......WiiU is almost like a real life Professor Layton puzzle.....where, what, how, when, why.....?? It just keeps coming.

We are told it's a 1080p system, that's "as" powerful, if not more so, than current systems. Well, those current systems are around 5-odd years old now...the absolute LEAST I would expect is for them to graphically match what is out there. Fuck it Nintendo, BLOW THE LIVING FUCK OUT OF WHATEVER IS ALREADY OUT THERE......don't just do "as good". So how powerful is it? What are the specs? How many controllers can I connect? It used the Wiimote, so I take it the sensor bar is still needed? Is it backwards compatible? How big is it? What is the new disc system? HDMI? How much are additional controllers? Don't you think it's a bad idea to have it attached to a shoddy plastic gun? How many batteries does it take? How long do they last? Can I hook up my new 3DS to it? If not, why not? Can I stream porn to it so I can "disappear" upstairs for a while? How does it connect online? Friends codes? How does the video conference calling work? Is there an additional cost to play online?

This is my dilemma. What I saw had promise, but Nintendo didn't explain just why I needed to get this system. Yes, it's out next year, but why do I need it? Sure, it gives something to everyone, but an old proverb says "If an Eagle chases two rabbits, he will catch non". Sure I can see what they are doing, i'm not that fucking thick, but non of it has been explained. It basically broke down to "we are releasing this thing, we aren't telling you how powerful it is, or what games are coming out. This may come out, and we may get this game......everything you are seeing is what may or may not happen.....this game may be released...this is what Zelda could look like, but it's just a tech demo, so don't count on it. It may cost this much, but it may not, so instead we will just leave it where we have and we'll catch you next year".

Why? Why go to all of that trouble and tell us nothing? It's akin to having a classy whore sidle up to you in a bar, whispering oh so dirty nothings into your ear about what she's going to do to you, and how much you're going to like it and why you will never look at another woman after what she is going to do to you, only for her to jump in a waiting cab and take off until some random point in the future. You'll just feel let down, confused and you'll have to go and do something with that woody that you have in your pants. The news that Smash Bros was coming to WiiU had some cheers from the crowd, but that all soon died down after the conference when the developer of the Smash bros series said work hasn't even started on the game yet!

I applaude Nintendo for doing something new. In trying to get an entertainment system that will be for every household they seem to have the right idea. Unfortunately, that's all it really was. An idea with no real substance. A game console souffle. A Nintendo Cheryl Cole. I'm hoping the upcoming months and the Tokyo game show will really go in depth with the system, and i'll become as indoctrinated as the Nintendo fanboy massive that are seeing this as another huge win for Nintendo and another dominating performance over Sony and Microsoft at E3.

But with the news that Nintendo's shares have plummeted to their lowest in five years after their's not just us gamers that need convincing.

Tuesday, 7 June 2011

E3 2011.....Microsoft and Sony.

You can't dodge the fact that E3 has arrived. Like a vast videogame ebola virus E3 has swept over every gaming site known to man. Both Microsoft and Sony had their conferences yesterday and they showed their wares to all. Now i'm not going to go in depth here, sites bigger than mine have minute by minute run downs of every nuance of the shows, so i'm not going to go into every single thing that's'll bore you, and I can't be arsed to write it. I'm just going to go into what impressed me, and the more interesting....what bored the tits off me. So dear on.


Microsoft bored the arse off of me. Starting off with a playthrough of a level from Modern Warfare 3 it started well. Starting with an underwater infiltration to take out a submarine, we saw the troops then storm the surfaced vessel, taking out a bunch of soldiers and then descending into said submarine to kill anyone breathing and take it out. Another level from MW3 was shown, where the mission was to take out a rader dish and then jump in a helicopter to take out some Hinds in a shootout in the sky. It looked hectic, in a Michael Bay -explosion-every-two-seconds kind of way, and a speedboat chase through an all out scrap with battleships and fighter jets impressed, but it's a case of Modern Warfare 2.5 than anything overly new. The new Tomb Raider reboot was shown which looked more than influenced by Uncharted, which is fair as I guess Uncharted is influenced by Tomb Raider, but the playable demo looked more like an interactive cut scene than a game. Still...early's not out until next year. Mass Effect 3 was brought out, looking absolutely amazing, but the much touted Kinect compatibility, instead of doing something new like a Minority Report-style galaxy map you control with mere gestures, boiled down to shouting "Liara.....move up". You don't have to use Kinect with it, and thank fuck, as the game looked 1,000,000 better without it. Another game with Kinect slapped into it was Ghost Recon Future Soldier. With the POWER of Kinect you can assemble/disassemble guns with a wave of your hand, use voice commands to snap different parts into your gun, which went down well with the brain dead among the crowd, and generally look awkward when you try to actually play the game hands free. Ubisoft said all of their future Tom Clancy games will feature some kind of Kinect use.....and the gaming world let out a little tear.

343 Industries confirmed the rumour of a Halo: CE remake, which is a complete redoing of the first Halo game, with the option of original/remastered graphics, online campaign co-op and seven multiplayer maps all using the Reach engine. More details to follow, and even though i've played Halo several times, i'm looking forward to the remake. Kinect was featured heavily, with new Kinect sports games, a new Disney title where you can tour Disneyland and partake in mini games featuring all the characters you know and hate. I can't see it, but hey, if it means you get to tour Disneyworld without having to go to France it gets a thumbs up in my book! Kinect was heavily focused on, and they trotted out of of the usual embarrassing, tepid, lifeless, soul-sapping people on stage to demo the games, as forced fun as you can get. They showed the much talked about Star Wars Kinect, which I would have basically not shown. It looked nice, in a strange pre-rendered kind of way, and i'm sure budding young Jedi will love it, but the lag was awful. I fact, i;d go so far as to say it wasn't laggy, it looked like the guy who was demoing the game rehearsed it all before hand and his body forgot the lines. Fucking awful. Some other Kinect software was on show, some free software which will be available right now, the more interesting of which is where you can scan an item and it brings it to life, such as in the demo a women held up a comedy-faced backpack, which after scanning in the front and rear magically came to life. I expect there to be laughing, hopping dildos on Xboxes all over the world as we speak. They had loads of XBL related announcements, such as Youtube coming to XBL, Bing as well, Xbox TV, they are really going all out for a universal system under your TV. UFC's Dana White popped on stage to mumble something about UFC and Xbox Live, but Dana would turn up to the opening of a bag of crisps, so that's nothing new.

Microsoft ended with the confirmation that Halo 4 is on it's way, it's out next year, and it's the first in a whole new trilogy. Which of course is welcome, we all love a bit of Halo.

So that was Microsoft really. No surprises, no new IP, nothing apart from chucking Kinect down everyones throats and eye holes. What they needed to do with Kinect was get the core on board, and apart from a few voice commands, or molesting weapons in shooters they had nothing....No Panzer Dragoon, no Steel Battalion, nothing that shouted out "I NEED A KINECT!"

Microsoft conference rating: 5/10


"Put on your 3D glasses.......put on your 3D glasses" barked the order at the start, and straight away I knew most of the Sony presser would go right over my head. A huge trailer for all things Sony played, and well...I guess you had to be there to appreciate it. Sony game an apology for the PSN downtime, basically telling all of their loyal customers they appreciate the support, and I thought they did well not to have a fucking powerpoint presentation about the whole happened, we dealt with it, this is what we have coming. Handled well I thought. Sony jumped straight in game-wise with Uncharted 3, and it didn't fail to impress. It looked like setting a new benchmark for in game visuals, with the scene playing out on a ship in a storm. The water and rain effects were literally jaw dropping, and the game itself looks like another welcome episode in the franchise. A new multiplayer game set in the E.V.E universe was presented, and was instantly lost on me. It just looked like a space Call of Duty, and looked a bit bland. SOny were touting 3D, and announced a new entry level 3D TV, capable of displaying 2 3D images at once for co-op gaming. I'd still argue that £500 for a 24" TV isn't exactly entry level, and i've still not been convinced that 3D gaming is anything but a fad. Loads of bollocks featuring Move was shown, the usual sports games, mini games.....yawn. inFamous 2 was trotted out, looking good, if generic. Bioshock infinate looked great, although i've never been a massive fan of the series, but if you are I can see why you would be creaming over the showing. They also showed Resistance 3, which is to the colour yellow what Gears of War is to the colour blue. They had some good news regarding exclusive content for their games, and the PS3 version of Battlefield 3 will come with a free copy of Battlefield 1943, which is welcome. Then they brought out the Playstation NGP, or as it is now officially know, the PSvita. Sounds like a low fat slimming biscuit to me, but hey ho. AT&T was announced as a broadband provider in the States, which drew some unexpected groans! The games, such as Uncharted looked good, but my thoughts on the PSvita haven't changed. Some people crave such a powerful handheld, I don't. I'm not that bothered about having a device as powerful as Skynet in my hands, but millions are, so i'm in the monority. However, at $249 for the wifi vita it'll sell shitloads, and puts it into the same price band as the 3DS. Your move Nintendo.

Sony conference rating: 7/10

So in my eyes Sony took it from Microsoft. New hardware in the form of PSvita, some great games, especially in the sublime Uncharted 3, some good exclusive content. Both were concentrating on their respective fields, such as Kinect, Move and 3D, and all of that guff bored me to tears. Microsoft failed utterly in getting me to think Kinect is a must have device, as did Sony with 3D/Move, and I think the lacklustre applause from the crowd backed up my fears.

So. It's all Nintendo's to win. They are going to have to be fucking abysmal not to take this E3.

I'll have a full report on Nintendo's conference later today.

Your thoughts, as always, are appreciated.

Sunday, 5 June 2011

Resident Evil Operation Raccoon City: E3 Trailer(Exclusive)

I'm still not sure about this game, but the latest trailer looks great. More details to follow in the coming week.

I'm still not sure about the whole "able to kill Leon Kennedy" thing.....but hey, it could be a laugh.

Friday, 3 June 2011

Sony "Welcome back" package is now live.

Just a quicky guys. According to Sony the Welcome back package is now online, so pop along to the store and get those free games.

Find the blog post right here.

Tomb Raider "Turning Point" Debut Trailer [US Version]

Let's get it out of the way........yeah, I would.

It looks stunning though. Then again, with this being the 27th reboot i'd expect looking good is the least we can ask.

Details on the release are expected at E3 2011 next week.

Kojima Productions: FOX Engine(For Kojima's next game!!!) Interview [E3...

Just make Snatcher 2 and have done with it, you complete git.

Oh....and a HD remake of Twin Snakes while you're at it.

Thursday, 2 June 2011

What I want from E3 2011.

Well guys, it's almost that time again. The time we all get REAL giddy about new announcements, gaming sites clamour to out-rumour each other and we all sit in anticipation, awaiting the moment one gaming company delivers an announcement of Hiroshima-style proportion that see forum message boards collapse at the amount of fanboy-fury that is spewed out onto them. One of my favourite, FAVOURITE things in life happens when E3 hits, and that is fanboy rage. Now i'm no fanboy, I've been a multi-console owner from around the age of the NES/Master system, but I just love when a big company announces that one of their games, which used to be exclusive, will now be available on both systems. The rage, anger, frustrations and threats of boycotting company "X" have me almost pissing my pants with joy. Arguing over which is better, the Xbox 360 or Playstation 3, is like arguing over which of the Olsen twins you would rather screw.....whichever one you get you're going to have a great time. But if it were not for these announcements and fanboy rage, we wouldn't have videos like this one, featuring a complete and utter cretin who is so completely sexually dedicated to his PS3 he must have thought the recent PSN outage was just her having an extremely long digital period!

Just look on Youtube....the amount of people spouting the same bollocks as him is quite frightening.

Anyhoo. E3 is here next week. Runours are spilling out about what will be there, what won't be, and I for one would love to go. Maybe this time next year i'll be there, but as of now i'll just be trying to work out which live stream of the event isn't going to die as soon as I click "Watch now". I'm sure there will be a shitload of announcements over the few days that E3 is running, but the ones that I want to see follow right about under these words:

1. NO Kinect use in Mass Effect 3.

That's right, No Kinect use in the game at all. What I really want to see from Mass Effect 3 is some more of the RPG elements that made the first game so fun. I want to see half planet scanning/half planet exploring. I want to see the return of customisation to armour and weapons that was in the first, so scopes, rifle butts, all the stuff that made it actually fun to navigate a menu. However cool selecting your galactic destination with the point of a finger "Minority-Report" style may be, I don't want to see it. Why? Because it means i'll have to put my fucking hand in my pocket and actually buy one of the bloody things. If it has Kinect enabled features there is no way on earth that I will pass it by, and I don't usually have £100 lying about just to splash out on something. Of course, if some MS-working employee is reading this blog, i'd gladly take one for "review-purposes".

2. Nintendo to release something fucking "New" for their next console.

Yeah, it's going to be more powerful than the Xbox 360/PS3.....i'd fucking expect so for a new console. Their tech is what.....5 odd years old now? I'm expecting it to visually fuck my eyeballs to orgasm. The thing I want from Nintendo is some new games. Make a new Excitebike! Make a full 3D online Pokemon game. Something new. I already know what the fuck we'll have. Come on, it's Nintendo, it's not hard. "New even wider track edition of Mario Kart". "New same old Zelda game that looks better but plays the same as the god-damn tired last 4 games". "New Wii fit with brain training". "New Mario galaxy 3...this time with Fludd". "New old but new Pilotwings....set again on Wulu Island". All you Nintendo fans can cry all you like....but if you even DARE cheer as Shiggsy takes to the stage with sword and shield in hand and shows the same old Zelda game that looks "realistic" i'll personally stick the Hero Sword right up your arse crack. When Nintendo took a chance and made what is HANDS DOWN THE BEST 3D ZELDA GAME EVER......The Wind showed Ninty at their best. If you make the new Zelda game look like it's characters are marionettes, with almost stop-motion animations and graphics then we will talk. Graphically tart up a 13-yr old game and you have lost me.

3. Nintendo to take advantage of the 3DS.

As simple as that. Get the devs on board and take the VR stuff, the camera, everything that makes it such a potentially devastating handheld and convince people that are sitting on the fence. You have created this glasses-free, 3D is the time to unleash it.

4. Sony NGP to bomb.

I shouldn't really say stuff like this, as I don't really hate anything. Well, that's a lie, I hate everything until it proves me otherwise. I just hate Sony's attitude when it comes to stuff like this. Nintendo show some kind of innovation when it comes to products....Sony's answer is to just chuck pure brute force and processing grunt at anything that comes it's way. And the NGP is yet another in the long, long list of Sony products that promised the earth when they make the initial announcement, and then quickly change when they realise how expensive/pointless that they are. Remember all that bollocks about the PS3 being able to render two-separate HD signals? Yeah me too. Never happened. This is the usual bollocks you get from Sony about a new console when it's ready to be released.

Remember all that shit in Warhawk? No, me neither. I do however, remember the time when I saw someone on my team glitching, having an epileptic fit as his head was wedged in a barn door. So from the dream, to reality.

That's be the "power" of the Cell eh, Bishop??

I don't want games on a handheld to be "as" powerful as my home consoles. That's why I play them at home. Handheld consoles are perfect for the bus, the train, for taking a big dump or something to play when the missus wants to watch "Britains got mentally challenged talent", and bite-sized, enjoyable games are perfect for that. Make something like the next Tetris and i'll plump in for the NGP. I'm never, EVER going to make a purchase is it's a continuation of the PSP. You have cameras on there, power, and that weird rubby panel on the back....INNOVATE YOU CRETINS!

5. A new Metal Gear game.

A new games in the Metal Gear series. That's all. Oh, and to confirm the rumour that Peace Walker will get a release on the PS3. I'll wank myself silly to any of the above.

6. Final Fantasy VII remake.

I'd actually prefer a remake of FF VI, as I think hands down it's the better game, with the greatest videogame bad guy in the history of digital entertainment. That will never happen, and what with the entire Final Fantasy almost begging Square/Enix to make this well, i'll have to say i'm with them. A few rules though. No voice acting, that is the first. No messing with the combat/materia system, probably more important. And next, just a visual upgrade. Do what you have to do for the world map or whatever, but DO NOT MAKE THE WHOLE FUCKING GAME 3D. Make each screen look like a bloody oil painting, make the characters 32,000,000,000 polygons each, I don't care, just keep the game as it is. Visual and aural upgrades...that is all. I mean really.......who wouldn't want to play this??

I thought not. I had an erection a mile high all of the way through watching that.

So that's my E3. Deliver all of that and i'll be very happy.

Well, that and the announcement that Gears of War is PS3 bound, or that FF VII is coming to the 360. THEN we will have an E3 to remember.

*Disclaimer. This is the opinion of Gamefreakblog. Any fanboy rage directed it me will firstly be welcomed, then laughed at. By all means let me know your thoughts. As always, they are greatly appreciated*

Wednesday, 1 June 2011

Gamefreak favourites: Medal of Honour "Friends from afar" playthrough

Hey guys, thanks for checking out the latest in my Gamefreak favourites series. Continuing from yesterday, literally in this case, is the second video in the series taken again from Medal of honour, and it's the level straight after yesterdays "gunfighters" video, where we see our characters sniping the shit out of the taliban in the mountain regions of Afghanistan.

There is a wealth of games to come in this series, so please stay tuned. And keep your comments and emails coming....I appreciate them all.

Your thoughts, as always, are appreciated.

Aliens™: Colonial Marines Teaser Trailer

Everything here is shamelessly ripped off from the Sega blog. I'd write up something myself....but i'm too busy pleasuring myself over the news!


Catch a First Look at E3 2011 of the Game That Pits You and Your Friends Against the Deadliest Killers in the Galaxy

“It’ll be dark soon, and they mostly come at night… mostly.” LONDON & SAN FRANCISCO (June 1st, 2011) –SEGA® Europe Ltd. and SEGA® of America, Inc. today announced that the highly-anticipated first-person shooter, Aliens: Colonial Marines™, will be launching in spring 2012 on PC, PlayStation®3 computer entertainment system and the Xbox 360® video game and entertainment system from Microsoft. In partnership with Twentieth Century Fox Consumer Products and developed by critically acclaimed studio Gearbox Software, Aliens: Colonial Marines will bring new levels of bone-chilling suspense and adrenaline-filled action to the renowned franchise. The game pits players against the universe’s ultimate alien killing machines, the Xenomorphs, in claustrophobic environments guaranteed to produce blood curdling thrills that the movie is renowned for. A first look of the game is presented in the South Hall at SEGA’s booth #2023, at this week’s E3 in Los Angeles.

“To Gearbox Software and its peers throughout the industry, ALIENS is one of the most influential science fiction properties of all time,” said Randy Pitchford, President of Gearbox Software. “Aliens: Colonial Marines, designed as an interactive successor to the landmark films from Twentieth Century Fox, is a dream project about which our studio is deeply committed and passionate.”

“Aliens: Colonial Marines will be THE definitive ALIENS gaming experience,” said Gary Knight, Senior Vice President of Marketing at SEGA Europe and SEGA of America. “Gearbox Software are doing a brilliant job translating the thrill and horror that ALIENS stands for into an action-packed shooter experience with co-operative gameplay at its core.”

Gary Rosenfeld, Senior Vice President of New Media for Fox Consumer Products added, “It’s no easy task to take on one of the most influential films of all-time, but SEGA and Gearbox are not going to disappoint. This game will be a must-have for fans of the ALIENS franchise and gamers around the globe.”

Aliens: Colonial Marines begins with an ostensibly abandoned ship, the U.S.S. Sulaco, recovered in orbit around LV-426. Players lead a group of highly trained United States Colonial Marines as they board the deserted craft to uncover the fate of the crew. They will have to fight to survive unspeakable horrors and their own anxieties as they chase down the truth behind a galaxy-spanning deception that places humanity at the mercy of the most murderous and deadly species in the universe. Aliens: Colonial Marines features authentic environments, such as the surface of LV-426 and Hadley’s Hope, weapons inspired by the film series and is designed to provide an exhilarating and engaging new chapter in the Aliens universe.

Aliens: Colonial Marines will be available spring 2012 on PlayStation 3, Xbox 360 and PC. The game is also on display in the South Hall at SEGA’s booth #2032, at this week’s Electronic Entertainment Expo in Los Angeles.

For more information about the game, please visit

Lord of the Rings: War in the North preview

I don't know how this game has passed me by, but if this short trailer is anything to go by i'll certainly be keeping my eyes peeled. LOTR: WITN (that's a mouthful) is a co-op game based in Middle Earth, with you and some buds teaming up as an Elf, a Dwarf and a human, battling it out against all things evil.

Some of the LOTR games have been hit and miss, with my probable favourite being LOTR: The third age, which I loved. I'm going to keep my Sauron's eye on this any game featuring giant eagles taking on trolls is well worth a look.

LOTR: War in the North is scheduled for release in North America in August this year. Xbox 360, PS3 and PC versions confirmed.

Gamefreak favourites: Medal of Honour "Gunfighters" playthrough

Here is the first video in my "Gamefreak favourites" series, where I look at games that I have played, old or new, and show off what I think are the best levels in that game. As you can probably guess, I've been gaming since the 70's so there will be a wealth of levels that i'll be showing in this section of Youtube and here on me old blog! The first, and I explain why it was this level and game in the video, is the fantastic "Gunfighters" level from Medal of Honour (Yes....there is a "U" in honor, my American friends).

Stay tuned, and as always, your comments are appreciated.